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Wednesday, August 6, 2014

The Language of College Professors




I've found that every professor at school seems to speak in their own unique language. I'm not sure if it's that all History teachers sound like History teachers and all Science teachers sound like nerds or something but every single one of my teachers is their own unique butterfly when it comes to communication.

One of my teachers in particular has a style that makes it virtually impossible to focus on, it's about the same pace as a snail on crutches with the same intonation as a sleepy washing machine and while you're listening all you can think of is, "there's not enough coffee for this conversation." That being said, that style has almost become a challenge for me and I impart this advice on anyone who is having trouble understanding one of their teachers; make a game out of it. Trying to decipher what the teacher is actually talking about has become an exercise for me, it's like being a detective during the interrogation of a murder suspect or watching a movie where the audience knows who the killer is but the rest of the characters don't and you're picking up on the subtle hints that could give him away if only the stupid characters in the show knew what to look for (10 points to whoever can guess the name of that literary device.)

So while the rest of the class passes out and creates small flood planes with their collective drool I'm picking apart mysteries and being the scholarly detective of Baker Street and you should be too. 

Don't be one of those guys.